Archive for December 14th, 2008

Dear Michael Moore

Dear Mr. Moore,

I’ve been tuning in again after my TV hiatus which began with Hurricane Katrina and my consequent isolatory depression. It’s no coincidence that I was able to ween off my anti-depression meds almost immediately after the election of Barack Obama.

I’m relieved to see you getting some air time with journalists who respect your patriotic civil service. I’ve always been such a fan of you and I just wanted to convey that to say "thank you" to you would be an understatement: thank you for not giving up. Seriously. You have guts like no one else out there, giving a voice to the proletariat. We’ve always needed your strength, even when some of us said we didn’t. I needed you to speak out when I, and millions like me, crippled by depression and medicated up to our eyeballs, could not.

Again, thank you, and I hope you are beginning to see your work paying off. I hope that you’ll never have to say "I told you so"; I hope some of your letters are letters of apology in calling you everything but the true American patriot that you are.

Much love,

Tracey Bushman

Salt Lake City, UT

The Men Behind the Curtain

Wake up, everyone! We’ve been fleeced. We’ve been systematically fleeced and subsequently BLAMED for the crisis that has arisen from the fleecing!

I’m watching these housing hearings and I’m experiencing deja vu: I myself have been subject to such hearings because I wanted to build a house. I wasn’t trying to sell sub-prime mortgages to the public, I wasn’t taking unwarranted bonuses while fudging numbers, more generally to contemporary history, I wasn’t defrauding investors of $50,000,000,000.00. I wanted to build a modestly modern house on 0.06 acres in an historically designated neighborhood. Shame on me.

I wonder now if some of these corrupt bastards discussed public ignorance when they made their dealings. I think they probably chuckled to each other that no one would notice because everyday Americans were too busy with their own "scandals" of bureaucratic minutiae: parking tickets, personal debt, personal bankruptcy, equipment failure (broken cars, computers, windows), dismantled families, divorce, etc. I think they counted on it.

Meanwhile, well-meaning citizens fulfilled the wet dreams of the capitalists who drove them to their meaningless liberalism and "acted local", not global. They carried cloth bags to grocery stores, ate tofu, they recycled and composted. They did it all. And when they really wanted to get their political thrills, they participated in local government and really "spoke out" against people who were trying to denigrate the historic spirit of their historic neighborhood.

I wonder if these liberals are watching C-Span right now, or if they’re too busy buying tofu.

Reality TV

For real television reality drama, look no further than C-Span right now, where the Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac hearings include such delicious zingers as:

"Well, I’m sorry that you wanted to be the most popular girl in the school and you forgot what your mother told you about your activities."

—Rep. Darrel Issa, R-California to former CEO of Fannie Mae, Daniel Mudd, referring to F & F Mae/Mac’s usage of risky and unreasonable loans.

Owned!