A Forum for the New World Order

Ha! When I was grade-school-age, that word’s stepchild, antidisestablishmentarianism, was the boasting tool for anyone wanting to prove their spelling prowess. I, being apparently antiestablishmental from a very young age, argued that in fact the longest word was something else; a word which now escapes me. Not unfortunately, because it turns out even that word, whatever it was, wasn’t the longest in the English language. The longest word, technically, is some chemical term for a lung disease or something. In any event, I oughtta wrap up this introductory paragraph with a statement that ties this childhood narrative into a thesis on antiestablishmentarian propensity in contemporary history, and I thought of a premise tonight whilst watching "Burn After Reading", so there we go.

My impression on the first viewing was not only that the movie is friggin’ awesomely hilarious, but that it was a convoluted epic tale that took unrelated individuals and knocked them together in a tragi-comedic particle collider for no apparent reason (hence the tragedy). I realized tonight, however, that the tumult in "Burn After Reading" arises from the proverbial butterfly effect catalyzed in the opening scene.

*spoiler alert*

In the beginning, a man is fired, or more specifically, told he is being "moved out" of his position at the C.I.A.. Instead of letting them fire him, Cox (the man referenced above), preemptively quits. We can glean from his interactions that he’s an antiestablishment-type that muckraked, perhaps a little too much. We’re not sure that’s what got him "fired". In fact, the reason given at the exit interview is his drinking problem, to which he replied, "you’re a Mormon! Next to you, we ALL have a drinking problem!" Gotta love Mormons at the C.I.A..

You wanna see a drinking problem?! Cox’ll show you DRINKING PROBLEM. And so, his cheating wife now has real ammunition to divorce him, the proceedings for which she burns his financials and, tertiarily, his in-progress memoirs to disc, gives them to her lawyer’s receptionist who, in dropping the disc at her gym inadvertently lands the data in the hands of a personal trainer who is mislead by her hapless Hardbody accomplice to perceive the "highly classified shit" as a bargaining chip to pay the high cost of the cosmetic surgery she’s desperate to undergo and which she temporarily forgot about upon falling for the man who was initially having an affair with Cox’s wife. People die. People are literally murdered in this circus of events because of a string of misunderstandings arising from Cox’s bad fortune. I just went to the script to count the number of times he mutters, or yells, "what the fuck?". It was only 4, apparently. But this phrase seems to sum up the overarching theme in the movie.

I think the film serves as a warning to any establishment that would attempt to silence those who speak truth to power. If you think about it, each character suffers their fate directly or indirectly as a result of the C.I.A.’s firing move. "Burn After Reading" ends with the department head closing the case, saying "I’m fucked if I know what we did (to contribute to the case)". And there’s the irony: those at the tippy-top these days seem not to realize, or believe, or even care, that their decisions have serious consequences on the world.

WTF?!

Dear Delta Airlines,

I just returned from a round-trip aboard Delta aircraft from SLC to ATL. For the first time in my long history of travel aboard Delta Airlines I was forced to pay a $15.00 US fee per checked bag. Everyone had flights to catch, so there was seemingly little fuss concerning this unplanned extra expense. And I’m sure it took us all just a little time to remember the outrageous fares we had already paid in advance. What’s another $15, right? I’ll leave the outrageous fare out of this, since Delta did appear to have the lowest, but still exorbitant, fare at the time I booked my flight.

I would just like to know what corporate expenditure the extra $15 from each passenger was applied to.

Please be aware that executive salaries for publicly traded companies are usually published for average citizens to see. I don’t think I’m the only one who believes executives earning millions of dollars can afford this $15-a-passenger expense.

Thoughts?

Oh, and: just how many more rows of seats does Delta plan on squeezing into the Coach cabin before travelers start taking Amtrak instead?

Sincerely,

Tracey Bushman

From the screenplay for "The Last Temptation of Christ":
EXT. TOWNSQUARE – DAY

PAUL — who we recognize as the Zealot Saul who killed Lazarus —
preaches to a handful of villagers. Standing straight,
radiating confidence, he speaks with the evangelistic fervor
of a born-again Christian.

PAUL
I used to be a sinner. The worst
sinner. I did everything. Whored,
drank, murdered. I killed anyone who
violated the Law of Moses. Then, I
was struck by a burning light and a
voice called to me, ‘Saul, why are
you persecuting me? Why are you
against me?’ ‘Who are you?’ I said.
‘Jesus,’ the voice said, and he gave
me my sight. I opened my eyes and I
was baptized and became Paul. I bring
the good news to every country.

Jesus comes closer, the Angel by his side.

PAUL
I bring this news. About Jesus of
Nazareth. He wasn’t the son of Mary,
he was the son of God. His mother
was a virgin. The angel Gabriel came
to earth and put God’s seed in her
womb. That’s how he was born. He
took on our sins, he was tortured,
crucified — but three days later he
rose again and was taken up to heaven.
Death was conquered, praise God!
Death was conquered, sins were
forgiven and the Kingdom of Heaven’s
now open to everyone.

Jesus can restrain himself no longer. He calls out:

JESUS
Did you ever see this resurrected
Jesus of Nazareth? I mean, with your
own eyes?

PAUL
No. But I saw a blinding flash of
light and I heard his voice.

JESUS
You’re a liar!

PAUL
His disciples saw him. They were
hiding in an attic with the doors
locked when suddenly he appeared.
Only one, Thomas, wasn’t convinced
but he put his fingers in his wounds
and gave Jesus some fish, which he
ate.

JESUS
Liar!
(to people around him)
He’s a liar!
Disgusted, Jesus turns and walks away. His angel follows.
In the background, Paul comes after him.

JESUS feels Paul’s footsteps drawing closer. He’s about to
explode. Suddenly, he turns on his heel, grabs Paul by the
shoulders and shakes him violently.

JESUS
(continuing)
You’re a liar! I’m Jesus of Nazareth.
I was never crucified. I never came
back from the dead. I’m a man like
everyone else. Why are you spreading
these lies?

ANGEL
Quiet.

PAUL
What are you talking about?

JESUS
I’m the son of Mary and Joseph, who
preached in Galilee. James and John,
the sons of Zebedee, were my
disciples. We marched on Jerusalem,
they brought me before Pilate, but
God saved me.

JESUS’ Angel doesn’t like this conversation; he tugs violently
at his sleeve. Jesus shoves him aside. Paul takes Jesus around
a corner where they won’t be seen.

PAUL
No he didn’t!

JESUS
Now I live like a man. I have a
family. I eat, work, have children.
Do you understand what I’m saying?
Don’t go around the world spreading
these lies about me.
(shouts)
Because, I’ll tell everyone the truth.
Now it’s Paul’s turn to explode.

PAUL
Look around you! Look at these people.
Do you see the suffering and
unhappiness in this world? Their
only hope is the Resurrected Jesus.
I don’t care whether you’re Jesus or
not. The Resurrected Jesus will save
the world — that’s what matters.

JESUS
The world can’t be saved by lies.

PAUL
I created the truth. I make it out
of longing and faith. I don’t struggle
to find truth — I build it. If it’s
necessary to crucify you to save the
world, then I’ll crucify you. And
I’ll resurrect you too, whether you
like it or not.

JESUS
I won’t let you. I’ll tell everyone
the truth.

PAUL
Shout all you want. Who’ll believe
you? You started all this, now it
can’t be stopped. The faithful will
grab you and call you a blasphemer
and throw you in a fire.

JESUS
No, that wouldn’t happen.

PAUL
How do you know? You don’t know how
much people need God. You don’t know
what a joy it is to hold the cross,
to put hope in the hearts of men, to
suffer, to be killed — all for the
sake of Christ. Jesus Christ. Jesus
of Nazareth, Son of God. Messiah.

Jesus is listening intently now.

PAUL
(continuing)
Not you. Not for your sake.
(pause)
I’m glad I met you. Now I can forget
you. My Jesus is much more powerful.

I’ve been accused of many things in my life… but optimism? Seriously? What, in the grand scheme of things, could possibly be wrong with being optimistic? The main accusation I’m made to endure is my "messianic" "delusions" regarding Obama. I won’t back down on this. Y’all can believe in your fictional pseudo-historical characters, biblical and otherwise. I’m sticking with a sure thing: Obama. Allow me to turn what many of you think are my madwoman ravings into a more structured treatise on the Obama-Be-Godlike concept:

First: He ain’t even President yet. And already he’s been more productive by way of cabinet appointments than Bush was in the 8 years he festered in Office.

Second: He killed the Rove-ian machine. Politics as we’ve always known it was ruled by underhanded faux-scandal before Obama: remember Monica Lewinsky? Remember "Swift Boat Veterans for Truth"? Remember when anti-war was anti-American? Remember Reverend Wright?

My mother taught me as a child that those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it. She didn’t know about Obama. We the Bloggers stopped the Rove Warriors in their tracks this year. They weren’t counting on the INTERNETS! So, what if we let go of that politically corrupt past and undergo a true civic catharsis? We the Blogger People are now forever empowered to audit our leaders. At it’s advent, the blogosphere still seemed kind of news-y at best. Some brave souls were speaking out and getting SOME coverage. But when the election of this honest, anti-war, multi-racial guy was at stake, people really tuned in so that any attempt to lie was automatically subject to scrutiny. We the blogglers weren’t gonna take this one lying down. Christian had me imagining future presidential debates last night. He theorizes that instead of binary arguments of "for"/"against" politics, future candidates will discuss, publicly, what collaborative courses will best benefit the people. Think online video-conferenced debates.

Third: Holy momentum, Obama! Does anyone else see the crazy-awesome prospect of Obama’s promise to sign a stimulus package into law on the night of his inauguration? Think about it: on the night of the freakishly huge, unprecedented party that will be Washington D.C. and every city and town all over the world on January 20, 2009, Obama wants to set the wheels of progress in motion: Governors and Mayors all over the country have promised ready-to-go public works projects the moment such legislation is signed into law. Imagine following up the orgasmic Obamarama 2009 with crazy-progressive ground-breakings that will get Americans back to work at a pace unprecedented in this country’s history.

Fourth: Obama, the Uniter. Bear with me on this one. I totally had a "Obama-may-not-be-as-cool-as-I-thought-he-was" moment tonight, but then after work I heard his response to the criticism surrounding his Inaugural Invocation choice. It was, simply: we need to unite everyone.

I truly believe that only by bringing haters into the fold do we stand the chance of uniting. Imagine Obama outright ignoring these misguided demographics. They would then continue to cling to the same old victim platform from which they’ve attempted to make their cases against gay marriage, et. al. ("Threatening the Sanctity of Marriage", oh my!)

With such now-controversial individuals INSIDE the Obama mega-committee, the dialog becomes more common-sensical. Minds will be changed. I, frankly, envision the institution of marriage evolving to be something beyond what we can conceive under our current mindset. Think "Love Without Limits".

If you need more evidence, I’ll be glad to divulge as my hours-in-a-day permit. Actually, I aim to blog them as I think of them. Think "This Wasn’t Just Any Election: Part 23". I ain’t shutting up.

Wake up, everyone! We’ve been fleeced. We’ve been systematically fleeced and subsequently BLAMED for the crisis that has arisen from the fleecing!

I’m watching these housing hearings and I’m experiencing deja vu: I myself have been subject to such hearings because I wanted to build a house. I wasn’t trying to sell sub-prime mortgages to the public, I wasn’t taking unwarranted bonuses while fudging numbers, more generally to contemporary history, I wasn’t defrauding investors of $50,000,000,000.00. I wanted to build a modestly modern house on 0.06 acres in an historically designated neighborhood. Shame on me.

I wonder now if some of these corrupt bastards discussed public ignorance when they made their dealings. I think they probably chuckled to each other that no one would notice because everyday Americans were too busy with their own "scandals" of bureaucratic minutiae: parking tickets, personal debt, personal bankruptcy, equipment failure (broken cars, computers, windows), dismantled families, divorce, etc. I think they counted on it.

Meanwhile, well-meaning citizens fulfilled the wet dreams of the capitalists who drove them to their meaningless liberalism and "acted local", not global. They carried cloth bags to grocery stores, ate tofu, they recycled and composted. They did it all. And when they really wanted to get their political thrills, they participated in local government and really "spoke out" against people who were trying to denigrate the historic spirit of their historic neighborhood.

I wonder if these liberals are watching C-Span right now, or if they’re too busy buying tofu.